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Funny Valentine Quotes

Sharing a few laughs with your loved one is a good way to celebrate any occasion; and valentine funny quotes are a fun way of celebrating this day. There are lots of quotes out there, which will bring a smile on you and your partners face. Many people have come up with their own humorous explanation of Valentine's Day.


Humorous Valentine's Day Quotes


Everybody appreciates a good sense of humor. As Valentines Day approaches, you will find that many boyfriend, husband, girlfriend, wives etc look for humorous quotes to share with their beloved, some lighter moments, in the day. Here are some funny Valentine's Day quotes for you:

  1. Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. -Hoosier Farmer

  2. You can't put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories. -Chico Marx

  3. Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times. -Rita Rudner

  4. Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. -Groucho Marx

  5. I require three things in a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid. -Dorothy Parker.

  6. I love Valentine's Day. When you're a kid everyone gets a Valentine. It's like "TO TIM, NICE PANTS, LOVE SCOTT". It's Valentines galore! -Mike Birbiglia

  7. Valentine's Day money-saving tips:
    Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.
    In place of bubble bath, use lavender-scented dish-washing liquid.
    Forget rose petals. Sprinkle the bed with sliced beets! -David Letterman

  8. I want a man who's kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a millionaire? -Zsa Zsa Gabor

  9. Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone. -Lewis Black

  10. I just love to do special things for my wife on Valentine's Day. Like open the door for her when she puts all the laundry in the washing machine, or plug and unplug the vacuum as she moves from room to room cleaning. Guys, it's these little thoughtful things you can do to have a marriage such as mine. - Anonymous

  11. I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's Day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV. -Tracy Smith

  12. I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon. -Anonymous

  13. Today is Valentine's Day; or, as men like to call it, Extortion day. -Jay Leno

  14. The Eskimos have 52 words for snow because it is so special to them; there ought to be as many for love. - Margaret Atwood

  15. Sales ad at a store: ‘You are my one and only' Valentine's cards, now on sale: 4 for $5. -Anonymous

  16. Valentine's Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid really is. -Anonymous