My Dear Valentine

How to Make a Long Distance Relationship Work?

Your special someone has moved to another place and you are miserable. Will your relationship survive, you think. But making a long distance relationship work can be possible, if you are ready to put effort into it.Most people are advised by their friends and co-workers against long distance romances. Yes, the test of time and space can be too much for a couple. Even marriages can break up before such challenges. But if you and your lover are faithful to each other, making long distance relation work will not be a problem.

Why relationships turn into long distance affairs?

Romantic relationships often turn into long distance affairs because of some obvious reasons.

  1. You have fallen in love with a person who works in the armed forces and has been posted elsewhere.

  2. Either you or your lover has decided to pursue higher studies and has enrolled in some institution abroad.

  3. Either you or your lover is transferred to a different city or country by the organization you work in.

  4. You have met your perfect partner through a social networking website but have yet not met in person.

Your romantic relationship must be a long-distance one because of any of these reasons. Or it may be for some other cause. Whatever the case, it is best to think about the future of your relationship. Ask yourself some basic questions before you make any decision to continue your relationship.

Analyze your long distance relationship

Making a long distance relationship work depends on analyzing your feelings. Ask yourself why you want to continue your relationship. Is it because of an intense physical attraction? Or have you developed a strong emotional bond with the person? Relationships based on physical interests do not last long. It is better if you forsake the bond to avoid later heartbreaks. If your bond is an emotional one, you can surely carry it on.

How to make a successful long distance relationship

  1. Talk with your partner clearly and ask if he/she is really interested to carry forward the relationship. An affirmation from both ends will help both of you wait for each other.

  2. Rethink on the aspects to make the relation stronger. You may ponder on the very important aspect of the relation - are you both clear on the parameters you have set to make the long distance relation work. In other words, both of you should follow the rules and regulations of maintaining a healthy relation. Chart out relationship standards for each others.

  3. Try to meet with each other as soon and as often as possible. Whenever you do, spend a lot of quality time together. This will help both of you to remain in the hearts of one another even in times of absence.

  4. Have long phone conversations with each other from time to time. Install a webcam and have live conversations that can help you see each other. It will help kill the barrier of distance between you two. It is the next best option to personal meetings.

  5. Write love letters to each other. And no. Do not use e-mails all the time. Make it a point to write at least two long love letters to your partner during a month. Urge him/her to do the same. Handwritten notes give a feeling of personal communication and are always a favorite.

  6. Reunion or timely meets - Agree upon a time for reunion and try to stick to your schedules. The best way of staying happy in long distance love life is by meeting in regular intervals. You can agree upon meeting each other after every three months or may be six months depending on the distance you both are at. Ensure that whenever you meet your partner after so many days you plan something special for him/her.

  7. Communicate regularly - Mailing, writing letters, sending cards, gifts and text messages are some of the best ways to stay in touch. With the changing fast communication ways it has become very easy and simple to interact with anyone. Talk to your sweetheart daily at least twice and get the bond strengthened. Make your lover feel special and cared about when you are not near him/her. This is one of best way of your query to how to work out a long distance relationship.

  8. Surprise your partner - Time to time send him/her some cute gifts and love token on several occasion like - birthday, anniversary, your special days and may be just like that. You don't have to search for an occasion or reason to bring that sweet smile on his/her face. Just keep your love life pepped up and enjoy the romance even if you are miles away from him/her.

  9. Use Video Chat. In a long distance relation keeping in touch with each other is very important. You need to send E-mails to each other, call each other and send SMS (short messaging services) frequently. In the present times, the Skype Video chat is very useful for augmenting long distance love.

  10. Do similar activities at the same time. When people are in the same geographic location- they watch movies together, have dinner together. Even in long distance relations you can do the same. You may decide which movie to watch and do so at the same time at two locations separated by distance. You both may order dinners at different locales and have it at the same time. Speak over phone, use webcam or Skype- whatever makes you feel the presence of the other person beside you.

  11. Communicate in some way every day, more than once if possible. This is very important. You may even write snail mails or send cards by post. You love interest will surely be elated and store them. Viewing these cards at regular intervals gives the feel of love in the mind of the receiver for the giver. You may make call, chat and so on. Keep the channels.

  12. The long distance relation offers certain advantages.Yes, if you and your heart-beat are separated by distance - you probably will not have quarrels over small matters like toothpaste caps, which activity to do when. You can devote more time to your other relations - family and friends. You can give each other time and space.

  13. You can pursue common interest at different places. If you both have similar interests you may practice it at your own location. You will find enough matter to discuss and keep interesting conversation going on.

  14. Please do not try to control each other. If you try to dictate and make the other person do what you want you will be creating pressure on the other person. In this way you may scare him or her away from you. You of course do not want this to happen. Let him or her do whatever he or she is comfortable doing. Avoid jealousy. Be trusting.

  15. Try to challenge each other. This means you should try to surprise each other by making calls at unexpected (of course not wrong) times. Send gifts. You may also learn preparing new dishes to satisfy the taste buds of your loved one, when you both meet next. Utilize the time to make your future interesting and rosy.

  16. Why not discuss about your conjugal future? You may speak on how you propose to spend your life when you two come together. This will make you both feel secure about your future. You will also know what is going on in the mind of your partner.

  17. Remember but do not be obsessed with each other. Well, let your loved one linger in your thoughts often but not always because then you will be disturbed in your daily work. You are staying away from each other due to some cause. Let not that cause be unsuccessful. Then the pain you both bear by staying apart will be futile.

  18. Visit often. Whenever you get chance or time- you may travel to meet your partner. Both of you should take turns to visit each other. This is really very heartening and pacifying in a long distance relation.

  19. Be positive. Be happy. You are one of those blessed ones who have found love in life. This thought by itself is very satisfying. Enjoy the bliss of a conjugal life, even at a distance.

  20. Personal objects can be given as gifts to each other. If you give items of your daily use- your loved one will feel your presence. Try this and see the difference. The same will happen if you are gifted with such an item.

  21. Use long distance love quotes. This is the best way to make your loved one feel that you love him or her. There are many popular appropriate poems to convey what you feel for the moment. It is advisable that you have a store of love quotes written by famous people.



Dos and Don'ts of LDR

  1. Never be too pushy or nagging in your long distance relationship.
     
  2. Do capture the special moments spent together and share it.
     
  3. Surprise your partner with gifts, cards and unplanned visits.
     
  4. Don't disturb him/her during his workplace.
     
  5. Cultivate any hobby or activity where you both can get involved.
     
  6. Don't suspect your partner and build good faith in each other.
     
  7. Create a healthy and strong bond by staying in touch regularly.
     
  8. Criticize or negative reactions is totally - no no.
     
  9. Debate and arguments should be avoided.
     
  10. Discussion and suggestions should be welcomed.
     
Click here for more, Do's and Dont's of Long Distance Relationships

Hope you got all your doubts clarified on how to work out a long distance relationship. Wish you have a superbly exciting love life.

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