Home » Relationships » Courtship » Victorian

Victorian Courtship

Victorian courtship is a tradition, which was hugely popular during the Victorian age. Queen Victoria and her family and successors represent the actual Victorian society, where Victorian courtship also plays a vital role. There were some strict codes of conduct, which the people had to obey and follow during courtship.

There were already strict constraints of etiquettes and manners in the Victorian society. Moreover, the royal family imposed some more etiquette for courtship. But some of the rules were fascinating and imported special meanings to several love gestures. For example, pieces of clothing such as gloves and handkerchiefs were used as the tokens of love. Do you know the diamond ring, which has become so popular a concept to propose your lady love, has emerged from this era?

We celebrate Valentine 's Day with great flamboyance. But Valentine's day in Victorian era had a special significance. During this era, lovers are allowed complete freedom to express their love for each other. Love letters and cards were exchanged as tokens of deep affection. Apart from these, there are some mandatory and strict rules, which the lovers had to keep in mind every time. Some of the strict rules are given below:


Strict rules of Victorian courtship

  1. The Victorian courtships always were supervised. The woman was never allowed to meet or go with a man alone. Other women or her mother had to accompany her.
  2. An unmarried girl would never date a man at the night. A man could not stay for long in a girl's home. This was considered extremely impolite.
  3. Victorian society allowed some kind of freedom to girls, because they had the liberty to flirt with their fans.
  4. The girl always had to address a gentleman with an introduction.
  5. As mentioned earlier, the girl could never roam around alone, and she was supposed to be escorted by an older and married chaperone.
  6. Even if the girl entered the stage of courtship, she could never walk with the gentleman.
  7. The man could offer the girl his hand, if the road was uneven. That was the only touch, which was accepted between a man and a woman, who was not engaged to him.
  8. Women were restrained to ride alone in the closed carriage with a man, expect for a close relative.
  9. The unmarried girl was not allowed to call a gentleman at her home when she was alone.
  10. The girl should not be invited by any gentleman at his place.
  11. If engaged, the gentleman could not turn back to see any other girl.
  12. The gentleman was never allowed to have adulterated conversation with a maiden girl.
  13. Even after engagement, the couple was not allowed to have sexual behavior.
  14. In the relationship, intelligence was not at all required, neither any interest in the politics.

These are some Victorian rules for courtship, which both the man and women had to follow.