How To Let Go Of Your Ego And Improve Your Relationships
Do you pick up fights whenever there is a difference in opinion with someone? Do you feel angry whenever your words or suggestions are not treated supreme? Well, if you have answered yes to these questions chances are that people around you find it a little difficult to deal with your attitude.
Now, does this remind you of anything anyone said (directly or gave you a hint) about you hurting them with your inflated ego? Voila! We reach the root cause of the problem. Now that you are sweet and graceful enough to own up the problem, the diagnosis part (the most difficult part) is done. Just a little more effort from you will uproot it for good. From now on, your ego will never come between you and your relationships.
Here are tips to flex your attitude a little so that your ego does not hinder your relationships:
Try to recognize when you are arrogant: When you realize that you are being arrogant, you can take a deep breath, step back, and think how you would feel if someone behaved similarly with you. This thought will surely be pretty humbling.
Try to control your temper: Sometimes anger can make you do things that are way different from who you are as a person. It makes you lose your power of reasoning and to act or speak with maturity. Try to recognize when you are losing control of your temper. At that time it would be best to delay any reaction or action.
Try not to take everything to heart: When you feel that things are not going the way you want them to be, you feel offended. Try to adapt a sporting spirit when you deal with people and situations. Being hurt and offended will only alienate you from others.
Try to realize that you cannot win always: Life will not always go the way you want it to be. Having a competitive spirit is perfectly alright. But it should be a healthy competition. All is not lost if you do not always get the winning position.
Try to own up when you are not right: When you realize that you are not right, be mature and honest enough to respect the other person’s view. Arguing just to stick to your point only because you are too stubborn to accept any dissent is going to make people hurt or even hostile.
Try to avoid being dominating always: Accept that people will not always agree to and do what you want. Put yourself in your shoes. You would surely not enjoy being ordered around always. No one else would either.
Try to seek contentment in what you have: When you are not satisfied with what you have and are always looking to achieve more and more it makes you an unhappy person. Realize that there is no end to this. So the earlier you seek happiness in what you have the better.
Try to relax your expectations: Try not to tax yourself by expecting too much. This also applies to your expectations from others. There are always limitations to what and how much a person can achieve.
Try not to worry much about what others opine about you: It is human nature to like being liked by others. But segregate between people who really matter to you and those who don’t. Chances are you’d realize that people who really matter love you just the way you are.
Try to let go of control: Life is full of surprises. Even people and relationships are. Planning ahead is fine. But keep room for contingencies. Trying to be in control of everything is impossible and attempting to do so will only cause unhappiness.
As we round off, try to keep in mind, ego surfaces when too much of importance is attached to self. Ego makes us create two different teams – I and everyone else. Ego is different from self-esteem or self-respect. Ego involves feedback and reactions of others.
Self-esteem or self-respect on the other hand deals with innate gracefulness, passion, mission, values, beliefs etc. Ego is the first step of the great division between us and our loved ones. When we let go of restrains that hold us back from enjoying our ties with our loved ones to the fullest, we break free from being an isolated entity. From this vantage point, everything will seem to open up in a new perspective. Yes, it may be a little difficult to take the first step. But such discomforts can easily be won over when the result promises to be positive and fulfilling.
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